I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I love having hate sex.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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