I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
