dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
