you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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