We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
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That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
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Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
i think i just lost a toe
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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