After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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