obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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