Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
My balls are so social today.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize