I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I need to calm my uterus...
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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