I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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