okay pat passed out under dana's car
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
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My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
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Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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