There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
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