have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
