The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize