Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
