Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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