I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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