You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
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