I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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