I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Randomize