I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
