3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize