Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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