3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
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i want to swaddle you in tequila
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
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Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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