i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
