So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize
