I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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