If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize