I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize