Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Fuck appropriateness.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
