Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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