She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
