just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
