It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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