I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
