We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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