still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
