Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
