I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"