You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Randomize
