at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
