Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
