Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
