You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
