one two three fourrrrnication!
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
