Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
