Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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