woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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