I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
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