Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
